Review of a Movie that Doesn’t Exist – Never Trust an Iceberg

Here’s yet another review of a movie that doesn’t exit.

Never Trust an Iceberg

Genre: Drama/Random video of icebergs

Never Trust an Iceberg follows the life of the chunk of ice that sunk the Titanic and its attempts to put the past behind it and break free from the infamy of being the iceberg. Humans saw it as a remorseless symbol of nature’s wrath, while other icebergs resented the reputation they all got after the Titanic plunged to a watery grave. And yet, the iceberg was just in the wrong place at the wrong time.

No one ever remembered the iceberg’s charity work for underprivileged ice chips, or considered the horrible guilt it faced every second, knowing that if it had drifted in another direction, the Titanic and its passengers would still be around. So, the iceberg went on a soul searching journey, disguised as a white whale, making friends and posing for photos with Moby Dick affectionados.

I found this movie to be very touching and the last scene, where the iceberg finds that he’s traveled too far south, made me sob just like a baby who had his candy stolen by a pack of candy thieves. I highly recommend this film, but you’ll have to go Newfoundland and ad-lib dialog for the icebergs off the coast, since this movie only exists in my head.