Health Grannie Attacks!!!!!!!!

I recently posted a story about a health genie grandma who forced kids to eat healthy. I’ve decided to turn her into a mascot for parents to use when their kids refuse to eat their vegetables, or shun their casserole.  Introducing:

The Health Grannie!

Eat healthy, boys and girls. You wouldn’t want to make the Health Grannie mad, would you?

Doesn’t she just inspire you? I’m sure kids will look at this picture and dream of her chasing them with a tray full of carrots. I bet the little tykes will never put another pea or piece of liver under their napkin again.

Regurgitated Food, the New Diet Craze That’s Sweeping the Nation!

I’m a proud franchise owner of Cow Diet Inc.

Have you tried every diet out there? Has the South Beach Diet left you high and dry? Did the Atkins Diet wine you and dine you, then never call? Did the Cabbage Soup Diet beat up your best friend and steal your lover?

Well, I have the answer for you. The Cow diet is a revolutionary way to eat that not only melts the pounds away, but makes your hair silky smooth and gets rid of chronic foot odor. The Cow Diet is simple:  Eat all you want, but only after it has been digested and regurgitated by a trained Cow Diet Regurgitation Specialist.

How the Cow Diet works:

The nutrients in un-digested food is contained within a wall of dense cellular fiber. When a person eats un-digested food, their bodies have to work overtime to break it down into the proper nutrients. This causes the body to require more energy to complete this task and that, in turn, causes more hunger signals to be sent to the brain. You end up eating more just to digest the food that is already in your system.

With pre-digested food, the cellular wall locking away the nutrients is destroyed, allowing your digestive tract to absorb the nutrients straight, with minimal expenditure of energy. You will no longer have to eat as much to get the proper amounts of nutrients, plus you’ll find that you don’t have to spend as much time chewing and wasting precious minutes of your day spearing solid food with a fork.

Preparing pre-digested food is a highly specialized task that takes years of training and physical conditioning to form the food into proper pre-digestion that hits the right balance of digestion and nutrient content. You will need to get your food from a licensed Regurgitation Specialist to make sure you get the full benefit of the Cow Diet.

Take the next step in your health journey! Start the Cow Diet today!