Children’s Books of the Damned

I decided to try to write some children’s books, but it didn’t turn out so well. Someone actually called them “Children’s books of the damned.” I don’t know why, though. They’re perfectly reasonable stories. Here’s a few of them for you to decide.


This first one was my try at an epic fantasy war story for the under one crowd. I wanted to inspire youngsters to know that just because they couldn’t walk yet, didn’t mean they couldn’t be a part of protecting their home from invading orks. Even children can be heroes.


This one was my attempt to talk to kids about death. I think it turned out quite well, actually.


Superman capes really do make you fly. I saw it in a comic once. They’ve never worked for me, but that’s probably because I haven’t tried hard enough.


This is a fun story about a cat who travels to magical worlds after a fun ride in the dryer. Kids love dryers and they love cats, so I put the two together.


This a cautionary tale to make sure kids don’t overuse the toilet and strain themselves. I guarantee that you’ll only have to read them Toothy once and they’ll never make unnecessary trips to the bathroom again.


Kids will learn to cook with Stabby’s playful antics. They may even decide to cook on their own and give you a break!


This one is a little different from the others. It’s a story my mother used to tell me. I’ve faithfully reproduced her words so other children can enjoy her sweet tale.


So, what do you think? Are these really “books of the damned” or do I have something here?