Car here. This is a series of interviews I’m doing for my author, Rebekah Webb, for the participants of the Wicked Women Writers challenge. (http://horroraddicts.wordpress.com/2013/09/06/wicked-women-writers-challenge/) Since I only interview inanimate objects, I have used the power of booze and lack of sleep to transform my interviewees into various assorted objects.
Today, today I am going to interview a very talented gravy boat named Julianne Snow. She is the author of the Days with the Undead series. She writes within the realms of speculative fiction and has roots that go deep into horror. Julianne has pieces of short fiction in publications from Sirens Call Publications, Open Casket Press, James Ward Kirk Publishing and Hazardous Press as well as the forthcoming shorts in anthologies from 7DS Books, Phrenic Press, and the Coffin Hop charity anthology Death by Drive-In. Look for parts in a number of collaborative projects to be announced shortly.
Her entry into the Wicked Women Writers challenge is Not All Jacks Are Created Equal. (http://horroraddicts.wordpress.com/2013/09/07/www-contestant-9-julianne-snow/) It’s about one night stands, finding oneself naked on a train and drinking troubles away with a bottle of whiskey while a volcano sends molten death. It sounds like a typical Saturday for me, except for the volcano part.
You can stalk her at these handy locations:
Facebook: Julianne Snow
FB Fan Page: Julianne Snow, Author
Amazon Author Page: Julianne Snow
Blogs: Days with the Undead & The FlipSide of Julianne
As a gravy boat, you probably had dreams of someday becoming a real boat. What made you start writing instead?
I’ve never secreted any lofty dreams of becoming a real boat – it’s just not in my nature. But I knew from the moment I was just a small lump of clay that I had the writing big within me. I had dreams that I might have been a mug or a teapot; something that writers need. But in the end, I was formed into a humble gravy boat. And I’ve never looked back. As for what made me start writing, it was to fulfill the empty whole in my being, the one occasionally filled with gravy.
How does a gravy boat write? Do you pour gravy onto a table cloth, turning the swirls into words? Or is there another way to be able to put words to paper/screen?
I have tried to pour the words out myself, but I have horrible penmanship. I spend much of my time in the china hutch in the dining room and I’m lucky enough to share it with an antique typewriter who loves to cuddle with some sweet white porcelain once in a while. In exchange for a few cuddles, he’s agreed to transcribe my stories for me.
I know this may be a sensitive subject, but I heard that you have a crack. Does this affect your confidence as a gravy boat?
Who told you?? Why I cannot believe you would think it was appropriate to ask me such a question! I am a lady after all! *harrumph*
Tell us about your inspiration for Not All Jacks Are Created Equal. Did it involve staring into the sun until the afterimages turned into an interesting story? That’s how I come up with interview questions.
My inspiration was born when I needed to find a way to weave a super volcano, a bottle of jack Daniels, a commuter train and being naked together. It took me a few weeks to come up with a plausible storyline, but once the idea came to me, I scraped what I had already written, snuggled up to Remington and let my imagination weave it’s magic.
What made you turn to dark fiction? I always imagined gravy boards being more adventurous yet classy, dreaming about being magical pirate ships stealing the world’s supply of magical brown elixir. If they wrote, I always figured it would be epic historical fantasies.
The life of a gravy boat is dark to begin with. We’re the vessel of oily, but delicious, sludge – that can’t truly be good for anyone. And to be honest, we’re only ever taken out of ‘hiding’ during special occasions. Would you blame us for being a little harder than most of the other utensils?
Is it true that gravy boats are easily bowled over and can’t quite get a handle on the meat of a situation?
Who have you been talking to? Someone might need to take an unfortunate fall the next time we’re all on the dish rack…
Is there a special ladle in your life? Or are you currently unattached?
I wouldn’t call myself attached and I would never date a ladle if they were the last utensil in the drawer. Remington satisfies most of my desires at the moment so I’m fairly happy with my life. I do wish however that I could just once have a turn in the dishwasher. But I’m just not dishwasher-safe. I swear though, I can be trusted not to break if you just gave me the chance…
What else have you written and how many pieces of meatloaf have you aided in flavor?
Oh josh, I’ve written tons of stories! You can find my bibliography at http://theflipsideofjulianne.wordpress.com/bibliography though I do write under a pseudonym. As for meatloaf, I try not to associate with the seedier side of the meat world. I prefer to socialize with turkey, roast beef and lamb. Sometimes I’ll hang out with a flavourful pork roast but that’s not all that often.
What hobbies do you have? Do double as a dribble glass or a set piece in still lives?
I’ve tried to master other hobbies like soccer, cross-stitching and taxidermy, but nothing gives me the same joy as writing. I’m happy with my simple life.
Do you have any advice for young gravy boats out there who might want to try their hand at writing?
Find yourself a typewriter and get acquainted with it. It’s the only way to learn.
Another stunning interview Car. You have an incredibly Carsome ability to bring out the deepest secrets of any object around. Car on Mr. Johnson.
I’m glad you have found Carlightenment.